Chickened Out

Let's just say, I'm socially awkward.  Well, socially-don't-want-to-participate?  I have a friend who is the most BEAUTIFUL woman ever and has this very put together life and family and she used to invite me to everything.  I would always accept and then find a million excuses to get out of it.  I love to be invited to things, but I don't actually want to go.  I figure I'm going to be awkward and weird and I'd rather just stay home in my sweatpants.

A few weeks ago, I contacted the local swimming masters program.  I knew they met early in the morning, which would work for my schedule, and I knew that they were good and had good participation.  I have been interested for years but never did anything about it.  Over the weekend, I heard back from the group with a very detailed email.  I was excited and returned the email with plans to attend this week. 

Last night I was crazy tired.  I had gotten up at 5:30am to work out; spent the day running around trying to get last minute Christmas stuff done; and then finished the day with yet another workout (seriously, am I training for a marathon or an ironman??).  I was exhausted by 8:00pm and crawled into bed at 10:00.  That's pretty early for me.  I was so tired that I was like "well, if I wake up at 5:00, I'll got to masters at 5:30" but I did not set an alarm.

Wouldn't you know I woke up on my own at 4:45 this morning?

I didn't go.  I don't want to go alone.  I feel like that new kid at school and everyone's staring at you.  I don't want to be awkward.  Plus, I just can't justify the cost of it when I already pay a coach who writes swim workouts and have a Y membership where I do my swimming. 

Do you all swim masters?  Do you do separate swim workouts from your triathlon coaches?  Do you have a separate gym membership in addition to your masters program?